Apostate Kate2

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Posts by Apostate Kate2

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  47

  My mom got disfellowshipped.

  by reneeisorym in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my mom called tonight to tell me that she got disfellowshipped!!!!.

  of course to me this is like the greatest news ever and to her its the worst ever so i'm seriously having a hard time being sympathetic.

  i just know this could mean she's out for good and it definately means i've got my mom back.

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  Apostate Kate2

  {{{{{{Renee}}}}}}}}

  Maybe this will be the beginning of your parents freedom. Keep us up to date. Sometimes it takes 2 steps forward and 1 back for awhile.

  Love~Kate
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  22

  Apology for raising children in the Truth

  by jeanne40love in

  1. social
  2. family

  would you apologize in writing to your children for raising them in the truth?

  i've apologized verbally........ none of them is going to meetings any longer...... my husband and i have been drifting away for several years..... .

  i was raised a witness, and thought we were doing the right thing.

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  Apostate Kate2

  I apologized verbally many times but actually did it in writing tonight. I had a family birthday party here today and spent some time with my daughter. She has some obvious mental health issues that she is not dealing with so after she left I wrote an email letter to her.

  Sometimes the apology isn't enough, I have to try to fix the damage done. She is my firstborn and got the worst of it even though I did not force meetings on her, nor did I ever make her go out in service. I was a sick neurotic mother from being raised a dub and still believed 100% it was "the truth" until she was 12. She did go to a private dub school and some meetings.

  It's hard because on one hand I want to explain why I was such a bitch, on the other I don't want to make excuses but own it. It's all very heartbreaking. I wish we got do-overs. I'd gladly give my life to give her hers back. What her life could have been had she had the unconditional love and nurtering she deserved.
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  70

  What is your opinion of prayer?

  by journey-on in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  do you still pray?

  how are your prayers different now that you're not a jw?

  what do your prayers involve?

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  Apostate Kate2

  Prayer is the most important aspect of my life. Talking to the Creator, asking His guidance, thanking Him for this awesome life, brings me the greatest joy and peace. He is not the god of the Watchtower.

  Here is an incredible book I am reading; "The G.O.D. Experiments: How Science Is Discovering God in Everything, Including Us"
  Schwartz, Gary, E. / pages

  He is a proffesor at U of A. You can download it as an ebook for $7 at SimonSays.com This book documents proof of God, and one scientist's experience with communicating with him on a scientific level.
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  22

  How can I learn to more assertive?

  by Apostate Kate2 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i think this is left over from dubdays, dunno.

  when i need to be assertive i fizzle out.

  my husband was furious when he came home.

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  Apostate Kate2

  I have a serious problem and I am going to really work on it. I made those 2 boys come back. I explained AGAIN what we agreed on. Again they did a crappy job. They ended up getting $19 an hour a piece instead of $20 and I still have a yard full of rocks!

  What I learned from this experience is; I don't have a backbone. Just when I think I am so over dubjunk I realize that may not be so. Where do I even start? How come so many of you come out fiesty and assertive? I've been out over a decade now but have made little progress in this area.
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  50

  Has anyone found dating as an EX JW difficult?

  by sweetstuff in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  just curious as to what difficulties have faced people dating as an ex jw.

  myself, i have noticed the glazed over look in a guy's eyes when you try to explain why your family doesn't celebrate the holidays with you etc.

  new to this board, so if this has been well covered before, please forgive me.

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  Apostate Kate2

  For me there were major trust issues. I was so gullible too. I picked the wrong man over and over because I believed them. (no offense guys I know you don't all lie, especially ex JWs, they've had thier fill of lies) I finally had to list a set of standards and make myself hold a date up to them, and verify everything. I spent 5 years deliberatly not dating at all because I did not trust myself.

  The time alone was the best thing I could have done. I learned that I can trust and depend on myself. I don't need a man. I bought my ranch had my first very own sancuary. One Valentines Day 2004 I felt a twinge of lonelyness and dated a guy who lived up to my standards. We were married before the year was done and have been very happy.

  We may be a bit eccentric but are a good match. If he gets moody (men can be worse than a woman on PMS) I just go do my thing, no drama. I love my independance. No co-dependancy crap. His family on the other hand...they will never get it nor do they seem to care to try. They are very nice people, not eccentric.

  My husband is a little person and I think this is why we make such a good match. He does not understand the JW experience but he sure understands suffering and being a social outcast.
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  32

  Just to let you know

  by Rethinking in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i've decided to cut my ties with jws.. i don't post here much as i've stated before, but you all don't realize how much i appreciate this forum and the support it gives..

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  Apostate Kate2

  Good for you! That is not an easy decision to make. I always have believed that it benifits us in the long run to live, speak, and walk in authentic truth no matter what happens. Some just can't leave the JWs for family reasons and have to hide their true self which is so sad and I imagine conflicting and frustrating.

  Life only gets better after leaving. May have some real rocky paths to walk but your not on it alone.

  Love~Kate
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  45

  Destroying One's Faith

  by Sunspot in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  the jws are always grumbling that former jws are trying to "destroy their faith" and that they have nothing nice to say about the men who write for the watchtower or their peculiar teachings.. but then---jws go to people's homes and try to convince them that they should stop:.

  praising jesus,.

  celebrating or honoring their lord and savior on his resurrection or on his birth,.

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  Apostate Kate2

  Hi Sara ! I sent you a message. Those were some wild times weren't they? We were there to give disfellowshipped JWs a safe place to come chat that was always open and we tried to make sure someone was always there to talk to. The JWs hated it, hated us, how dare we do such a thing for apostate scum!

  And yes I have been DA and I have been isolated and alone. I know what it is like, but it is also ourselves we have to look at cant blame everyone else all the time because of our own failings.

  I'm sorry you have been feeling alone. Glad that you are here and are free to open up about your feelings. Here people are free to disagree, nobody will shun you or kick you off. If you have been DA'd for some offense, who are they to tell you when you are worthy to be forgiven? You know this Scripture well, Jesus talking; Luke 17:3-5 Be careful. If your brother sins against you, rebuke him. If he repents, forgive him. If he sins against you seven times in the day, and seven times returns, saying, 'I repent,' you shall forgive him." The apostles said to the Lord, "Increase our faith." If someone hurts you deliberatly you go "rebuke" which means tell them how you feel about what they did. That is if you hurt me, I am to go directly to you and tell you. When you say I'm sorry, its done. If you not sorry I am to pray for you and love you all the more. Matthew 5:44 But I tell you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who mistreat you and persecute you, So why are they shunning you? Why have they done the worst thing you can do to the human heart, withdraw affections? What gives them the right? Not God! As far as DF and DA goes, there is one instance and one alone in the Bible that JWs use to justify thier meaness and judgemental ways. They use it entirely out of context. A guy was flaunting in the church that he was doing his mother in law, well duh..something had to be done. 1 Corinthians 5:1 It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and such sexual immorality as is not even named among the Gentiles, that one has his father's wife. Ok so if I am going to a church, and this guy openly flaunts that he is doing his step mom and everyone thinks this is ok and no one says anything or does anything in effect condoning it, Paul was saying don't party with this guy. This is gross. Were you having sex with your stepfather? Paul wanted them to understand that church was not a swingers club.
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  22

  How can I learn to more assertive?

  by Apostate Kate2 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i think this is left over from dubdays, dunno.

  when i need to be assertive i fizzle out.

  my husband was furious when he came home.

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  Apostate Kate2

  Really? OK here goes..YOUR STUPID AVATAR LOOKS LIKE A DAM NASTY OLD ELDER WHO SMELLS LIKE CHEAP WALMART COLOGNE AND HAS THE MENTALITY OF A FERRET AND A BRAIN THE SIZE OF A WALNUT!

  ahhhh that felt good, now I can sleep...
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  45

  Destroying One's Faith

  by Sunspot in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  the jws are always grumbling that former jws are trying to "destroy their faith" and that they have nothing nice to say about the men who write for the watchtower or their peculiar teachings.. but then---jws go to people's homes and try to convince them that they should stop:.

  praising jesus,.

  celebrating or honoring their lord and savior on his resurrection or on his birth,.

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  Apostate Kate2

  Sunspot you are spot on with that observation!

  I tell you that the majority of JW are no where near as tormenting as the non witnesses,

  I beg to differ with you. I had been helping keep a disfellowshipped JWs chat room open on AOL for years and we were called names, spied on, and harrassed by active JWs. Last week a JW SIGHNED HERSELF UP to my yahoo group JWApologetics. Right on the front page it says "this group is open to everyone. Active JWs, non active, and former JWs all our welcome.

  The first time she gets email that is not pro Watchtower she writes this and sends it 9 times filling everyones email before I knew about it, "UNSUBSCRIBE ME FROM THIS GROUP IMMEDIATELY! Apostates have NOTHING in common with me, nor I with them.
  
  "DO NOT BECOME UNEVENLY YOKED WITH UNBELIEVERS...WHAT SHARING DOES LIGHT HAVE WITH DARKNESS..." 2 Corinthians 6:14-16"

  She calls us apostates, unbelievers, and living in the dark. All the time all she needed to do was click on the "unsubscribe" link on the email. She had to make sure we all knew how righteous she was before she left the group. When my health was failing badly I was told to die now so I can maybe be resurrected, if I die at Armageddon it's too late for me. That's just a tiny piece of this hate filled Watchtower pie.
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  22

  How can I learn to more assertive?

  by Apostate Kate2 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i think this is left over from dubdays, dunno.

  when i need to be assertive i fizzle out.

  my husband was furious when he came home.

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  Apostate Kate2

  I think that being a witness has a little to do with this for some of us. Think about it-we constantly had to justify those crazy beliefs, go to peoples doors and tell them stuff they didn't want to hear. . .speak in public when it is actually physically painful for some to do so---is it any wonder that we don't look forward to confrontation?

  Thank you everyone you are really helping me deal with this. Other people are going through such terrible sufferings, and here I am unable to do something as simple as this. I hope these boys are smart and come back to finish the job, my husband is taking pictures in the morning and will take them to small claims court if they don't. I feel so stupid to let this happen in the first place.

  He says they took advantage of a disabled women, oh that makes me feel great. I have a medical disability not a vision disability! I seen the job and pretended it was ok. JWdaughter I think growing up as a JW and holding in our true feelings causes problems for me to this day. You would think door to door crap would have made us more assertive not less.

  OK i'm getting tough. ...Bobbi that was brave! lol... You know people can be scarey! I think I just analyzed myself. This is the real root of it all. I have had some very bad and traumatic things happen to me when someone was violent and out of control. Dont wanna make people angry or bad things can happen....hhhmmmm